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Deflated

I imagine ya’all have seen them. Those big inflatable yard decorations that start making their appearances come Halloween and proliferate yards all across the land for Christmas. I think they are a hideous misuse of money and an overt display that people are idiots.
The neighborhood in which I now live has house after house of these idiots. Driving to my father’s place, up the long and seemingly endless row of houses that look so much like the next, I get my fill of these inflatable yard decorations. It is as if each neighbor is competing with the next, culminating with the guy on the corner whose house looks like Chevy Chase’s in National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation and is home to thirteen inflatable yard decorations.
I am amazed – or perhaps, appalled – by the excess displayed in this neighborhood. I was struck by it the first time I drove through it, which happened to be a hot day in the summer when the men were out in their front yards washing one of the many vehicles or RV’s or SUV’s that were parked in the garage, the driveway, the parking strip along the side of the house and on the street. Every house has at least two cars, one truck and either a boat or a motorhome. And, oddly enough, none of the rec vehicles ever move and no one is ever home. Hmmmmm… wonder why?? Duh!
Of course, they aren’t ever home until father and son stay home from work and school one Monday to decorate their home for Christmas. They are keeping up with the Joneses, the Blacks, the Smiths and the Johnsons. I cannot begin to imagine the size of the electrical bills in this neighborhood.
I am truly not a Scrooge. Honestly, I am not. I love this holiday and think that the meaning of this holiday is what is important. And, while I am not a Scrooge, I must admit… I get a HUGE kick each morning on my way out of the neighborhood when I spy the inanimate puddles of vinyl lying listless in the snow, disconnected from the source of their puffy-power while the family is away. That is my favorite yard decoration of all and I laugh all the way down the street.
 

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December 10, 2007 AKMPhoenix

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