It is at That Very Moment

It is at That Very Moment

“Why, after all you have been through with him, why on earth do you still love him?”

I have been asked that question so often throughout my life. It hasn’t always been worded the same way. Sometimes it has been about a good female friend. Sometimes it has been about a family member. But always it is the same, “Why, Angie, after all that, why do you still love them? Why do you still care for them?”

Sometimes I am unable to answer the question satisfactorily because usually the answer is, “I just do.”

The other night, while I was in an exhausted haze, I was staring at the television without really absorbing anything. There was a commercial advertising an upcoming special presentation. It was showing scenes from the show as I slowly clued into the action. A mother and daughter were talking forcibly and the daughter, with tears streaming down her face, declared, “He is no brother of mine! I don’t even know him anymore!”

The mother’s eyes grew wide and she calmly said, “That is not how you were raised. He is family. We love our family no matter what.”

The daughter wailed, “But he’s so… so… different. I can’t love him anymore because he is not the same person.”

Then the mother said, “The time to love him is when he is at his lowest and cannot believe in himself.”

And then I understood the reason behind my answer, “I just do.” I realized in that moment that I continue to love, even after all others have given up or stopped trying or have written the person off, because I instinctively know that it is then that the person needs love the most.

There have been times in my life when I have felt like such a failure and one person has taken the time to embrace me, to let me know that I have made a difference in their life. And, while I understand that it is sometimes hard to love those who are seemingly unlovable in that moment, who would better deserve it than them?

I imagine the world would be a much better place if that were the Golden Rule: Love him when he is at his lowest and cannot believe in himself.