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Small Things

I just realized that when I am tired, small things are large and big things are insurmountable. At this moment, I am working on only three hours of sleep. I tossed and turned last night until 12:30 am, unable to sleep. It seemed as though it was only moments later when I was startled awake by a series of loud coughs in the hallway. Delirious and disoriented, I looked at the clock. It was 3:25 am and I knew I was done for. There would be no more sleep for me.

It is now 8:56 pm and I am exhausted beyond belief. And the small things are way too big for me now. I have said, “Get-in-bed!” to my daughter at least six times now, each with increasing intensity and stacato emphasis. The last snap sounded like: (soft tone through clenched teeth) GET! (a little louder, still clenched teeth) IN! (quite loud and accompanied with a growl) BED!

And, I can’t breathe. I am frustrated with the battle of “who left what where and when” that is going on in the place where I live. I am tired of miscommunication and misunderstanding.

And… I’m tired.

Usually I am nice.

Right now, though, I feel bitchy.

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December 3, 2007 AKMPhoenix

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