In my work, I have discovered that most people do not breathe. Now, I realize that sounds ridiculous because, if they aren’t breathing, how are they alive??? Thing is, there is a difference between inhaling-exhaling and actually…
As I have my clients practice deep breathing and, specifically the “Yes Breath” technique that I share with them, there is one of three things that happen:
- They burst into tears.
- They immediately freak out, feel scared and want to run away.
- They get so seething mad that, at times, I fear for my life.
What I have discovered is that really breathing unlocks all the emotions my clients have blocked or stuffed or ignored. It is the fundamental building block of our life and the one thing that we are born with. Generally, in a healthy baby, no one has to teach that baby to breathe. It just happens. If you have ever watched a baby breathe, you will know that a baby breathes with their whole body. Their bellies fill to the maximum on the inhale, using their diaphragm and all abdominal muscles.
I have learned that there is a hormone that is triggered as the baby pushes its way through the birth canal, its head opening its path. That pressure on the baby’s head, causes the hormone to release which will trigger a massive inhale when the baby’s face hits open air. It literally causes the baby to breathe. Babies who are born via C-section are not triggered thusly. They may find, throughout their lives, that actually remembering to breathe is difficult.
As we grow to toddler stage and begin to explore our ability to stand and balance and walk, we begin to change our breathing patterns. We begin to minimize the inhale and exhale because we are using energy to remain upright. Then, that minimal breathing pattern becomes the norm and thus begins the ritual of never fully taking a breath. Minimized breathing is excellent for keeping at bay all your fears, sadness, anger, and whatever other emotion you are choosing to avoid. Minimized breathing – the norm for a vast majority of humanity – is a fantastic route for living without really being alive. Not breathing is a fabulous way to not be present. Your physical form may be there, but your mind and soul are elsewhere.
I remember the first time one of my mentors asked, “Angie, are you breathing?”
I looked at her and said, “Well, duh! I am here and talking with you!”
I imagine that she was expecting my sarcasm. The answer seemed so obvious to me on that day when I was feeling incredibly blocked and numb. The opposite answer, the one she knew, was actually the truth of my situation.
Quietly, she said, “I invite you to breathe really deep, all the way into your belly.”
That concept was foreign to me. Into my belly?! What the…
I tried it. Instantly, I was lightheaded as a full load of oxygen hit my system for the first time. Following in lightning speed I was accosted with sadness so deep and infinite that I wanted to collapse. Oh. My. God. I was so sad. I was so angry. And then I was so scared.
The good news was, I was feeling for possibly the first time in my life. And thus, I came to life. Right there before her, I came to life. I began breathing.
Since that day, I remind myself frequently to breathe. I take snippets of my day to breathe deep into my belly, rejoicing in the balloon-effect I have mastered. I use my breath to move with and through my sadness, my fear, my anger. When I begin feeling numb and responding with, “I don’t know,” I will breathe. The numbness moves and knowing steps in. And then I know… I AM ALIVE.
I am alive. I am breathing. And I am grateful for both…
